Here’s an Idea!

Most people, I imagine, have heard of the Tomatina Festival (pictured) that occurs in the Spanish town of Bunol on the last Wednesday of every August and regularly attracts crowds in excess of 30,000.

It dates back to an event in 1945 when a giant brawl occured during a festival where giant papier mache figures are paraded through town and people started grabbing ripe tomatoes from nearby food stands and hucking them at each other.

We Reginans are a hardy lot. So what I propose we do is start a Tomatina Festival of our own — with one twist. It’ll be held every autumn when the first killing frost is forecast and people rush out to their gardens to salvage all the green tomatoes still ripening on the vine. Then to celebrate the end of summer, we’ll gather at the new downtown City Plaza and chuck a portion of our bounty at each other.

With the media attention we’ll attract, it’ll put us on the map internationally. Plus, it’ll put the plaza to use. What do you think?

Author: Gregory Beatty

Greg Beatty is a crime-fighting shapeshifter who hatched from a mutagenic egg many decades ago. He likes sunny days, puppies and antique shoes. His favourite colour is not visible to your puny human eyes. He refuses to write a bio for this website and if that means Whitworth writes one for him, so be it.

6 thoughts on “Here’s an Idea!”

  1. While I admire the spirit of your proposal, I fear it would be an invitation to horrible bodily injuries from one corner of City Plaza to the other.

    Have you ever compared the density of green versus ripe tomatoes? My little brother and I used to throw them at each other every year, what with my mom having a crazy oversized farm garden… it’s about like throwing rocks at each other.

    That having been said, don’t we all need to blow off a little steam, time to time?

  2. If this year was like last year, when everyone’s tomatoes got blight and were mostly unusable, I’d be all over this (as Gordeaux says, with red ones only!). But this year, I think most of us are too thankful that we’ve got fruit to see any of it mushed up in the streets!

  3. But using green tomatoes would make us stand out in comparison with Bunol and all the copycat Tomatina Festivals out there. Plus, there’s the obvious Roughrider tie in. And it WILL draw people downtown.

    Sure, a few thousand people might end up with massive bruises, broken bones, concussions, and whatnot. But again, just think of all the publicity we’ll get. Like with those festivals in England where people chase wheels of cheese down hills and wipeout and stuff. Media loves quirky expressions of local culture like that. And tourists do too.

  4. Maybe it’s the redneck farmboy in me Ron, but my first thought about the “I’m not being cruel to gophers” comment was “Who cares? I’m not advocating boiling them in oil, or anything else that’s suitably medieval (in keeping with the trebuchet theme), but, um… they’re friggin’ gophers.

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