Readers Say The Darndest Things

Here’s a letter prairie dog got this evening:

Just read your feature “Presents for Everyone” and noticed that not one of the 29 gifts could be bought from any of the small local businesses that advertise in your mag. In fact you recommended on line shopping about 14 times!

Tell me again why small, local businesses should advertise in the prairie dog?

[Name witheld pending verification]

Regina

Okay loyal prairie dog/Dog Blog readers, take my word for it — there are many, many problems with what this person has written. Can you spot some of them? Leave your answers in the comments below. Best comment (as chosen by me) left by Wednesday noon 3:00 will win some kind of gift-wrapped prize (I have no idea what, but it won’t be lame).

I hope “where’s my prize for commenting?” Jeff is paying attention…

Author: Stephen Whitworth

Prairie Dog editor Stephen Whitworth will never, ever pass up a chance to make a Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo pun.

14 thoughts on “Readers Say The Darndest Things”

  1. If I owned a small, local business, I’d be more upset if something I sold did make the list.

    Regardless, you should probably send the commenter various sparkly things to make amends, and buy them locally. Since sarcasm is lost on him/her, at least she/he will have something shiny with which to entertain themselves.

  2. Well, I’m sure that at least one of your local advertisers would sell a bra “For a Girl on the Verge”.

  3. @1: Great minds think alike, or at least ours do. Just got home and on the walk here I figured out that whatever the prize is, it should be from a local store.

    @2: Hahahahaha!

  4. Buy comics for everyone! We have a few Cthulhu bobble heads left as well.

    Your friendly neighbourhood comic shop guy. Yay, ComicReaders!

  5. @2: My present is a trippy number with Warholesque Marilyn Monroes all over it — a little glum, but absolutely fetching; Thee Lingerie Shoppe, $158. Put that in your pipe and smoke it, reader.

  6. I just realized no one’s attempted to explain what’s wrong with this letter! I picked up the prize 15 minutes ago, and it’s a good prize. I’m happy to keep it myself if need be.

    But I’ll extend the deadline to 3:00 today.

  7. Did you buy the prize from a local downtown retailer or did you have Expedited in from some online company, Whitworth?

  8. It’s from a locally-owned, downtown retailer. And it’s excellent. And it looks like I get to keep it! Yay!!!

  9. Okay, I’ll bite:

    Gee, Stephen, is it that the vast majority of local businesses who sell stuff to prairie dog readers don’t actually advertise in prairie dog?

  10. Okay, I’m giving myself the prize–a bag of 49th parallel coffee from Atlantis. Yum!

    As for what was wrong with the letter: The writer asks “Tell me again why small, local businesses should advertise in the prairie dog?”

    Well, I don’t know–to tell prairie dog’s readers about your great local business and encourage them to patronize you?

    Like, duh.

    Besides, we’re editorially independent. It’s not our job to give every local business that’s too cheap to promote itself free publicity. Like it says in our masthead, “we write what we like and our readers like it that way.” We deliver eyeballs to advertisers. That’s how real publishing works. If some dork business owner wants to waste money on bullshit advertorials no one will read, there’s flyers, catalogues and a lot of really, really bad Saskatchewan-published “magazines” run by people with no brains, talent or integrity who will be happy to write blowjobs posing as articles about their business for money.

    Anyway, we’ve given tons of local businesses tons of positive free publicity over the years: restaurants, clothing stores (when we ran Street Wear), local venues and I’m sure I could find tons of other examples if I looked. So there’s another reason to advertise in prairie dog–we’ve done a great job promoting local businesses already.

    So that’s what’s wrong with this letter in a nutshell. Boycotting prairie dog because of one article that was inadequately blowjobby is stupid.

    But hey, that’s Regina!

Comments are closed.