Six In The Morning

1. GOODBYE EASTERN COUGAR, WE HARDLY KNEW YOU. U.S. Fish and Wildlife has called it: the Eastern Cougar is extinct. Apparently no one’s seen it since the 1930s. For quite a while biologists waited around, assuming the cougar had gone out to get some milk at the store or something. In 1973 they placed the cougar on the endangered species list, in the hope that it would see itself on the list and come home. But it’s been 80 years now, so enough’s enough.

2. CONGRATULATIONS AND GOOD LUCK, INTERNET. The internet, that plucky underdog, has been nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. Again! Maybe I should nominate a Prius or something.

3. GO GET YOUR IPAD 2 ALREADY. How’s that recently purchased iPad working out for you? Cutting edge and all that? It’s obsolete today! Probably not in Canada, though.

4. IF YOU WANT TO GO PICKET FUNERALS WITH ANTI-GAY HATEMONGERS, HERE’S YOUR CHANCE. The U.S. Supreme Court has ruled 8-1 that the Westboro Baptist Church has Constitutional protection to spread their unique brand of filth around. So yeah. If your military funeral experience is dampened by a lack of people picketing outside with signs saying “God Hates Fags” and “Thank God For Dead Soldiers,” go visit the States.

5. THE U.S. MAINSTREAM MEDIA IS INCAPABLE OF COVERING WISCONSIN. This piece from The Awl, observing the behaviour of CNN and The New York Times in Madison,┬áis the most damning thing I’ve ever read on the sheer cowardice and incompetence of news reporting in this crabbed, money-driven day and age.

6. IT’S NOT LOOKING SO GOOD FOR LONECHILD. Five former FSIN chiefs have called for the resignation of Chief Guy Lonechild in the continued wake of the Chief’s impaired driving charges from 2009. One attempt has already been made to impeach him – I can only anticipate that another one is in the works.

About Aidan Morgan

Aidan is a very serious man who's saving up for a nice dignified pipe. Then we'll see who's laughing.

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