Six In The Morning

1. MOVE OVER MCDONALDS. Once McDonalds was the reigning king of fast food outlets. But now Subway Restaurants has overtaken the burger slingers, with 33,749 locations to McDonalds 32,737.

2. THE PM IS OFF TO LONDON TO WATCH ARCHAIC RITUAL. Stephen Harper of the Harper Government is going to London next month to watch Prince William and Kate Middleton get married. Maybe he’ll get in a good proroguing before he goes.

3. A FRONT OF BLUSTER BLOWING IN FROM LIBYA. Gadhafi has responded to talk of instituting a no-fly zone over Libya. Is he happy? Or is he threatening to take up arms against a sea of troubles Western powers? What do you think?

4. SARM IS NOT SURPRISING ME. At the annual meeting of the Saskatchewan Association of Rural Municipalities (SARM), president David Marit identified rural infrastructure as a key area of concern. Well sure – when this year’s record snowfall finally melts, large swaths of the province are going to revert to a Pre-Cambrian lake. And that’s not even taking into account the ageing population, limited revenue base and the winding down of the Building Canada program in 2014. Another key area: rat control.

5. WE’RE NEVER GOING TO SEE A COOL BIG-BUDGET LOVECRAFT FILM IN OUR LIVES. One day after the news broke that Universal Studios had greenlit Guillermo del Toro’s adaptation of At The Mountains of Madness, they changed their minds and said “Hey, remember what we just said? Never mind”. The sticking point: del Toro insisted on making an R-rated film with a $150 million budget. Cowardly, cowardly studios.

6. OH MY GOD, SARAH PALIN IS STILL ALIVE. Palin is all set to deliver a ‘testimony of faith’ at a religious conference this fall, which will be broadcast to over 1,000 churches. Two things: 1) how much do you want to bet that she’ll bail? and 2) it suddenly strikes me just how irrelevant Palin has become to the world. Back in 2008 she was primo media chow and a serious contender for political office. Now the Republicans are gearing up for 2012 and she’s nowhere to be found. She’ll be opening shopping centres pretty soon.

And since we’re all up on the Star Wars videos, here’s Darth Vader being a jerk:

Author: Aidan Morgan

Aidan is a very serious man who’s saving up for a nice dignified pipe. Then we’ll see who’s laughing.

One thought on “Six In The Morning”

  1. #1. Oh, that’s because sandwiches made with salty, fatty cold cuts, with mayo and cheese are so much healthier than burgers.

Comments are closed.