Six in the Morning: The Snowclone Edition

6 in the Morning1.”THE CONSERVATIVE POLICY SEEMS TO BE CONTRACEPTION IF NECESSARY BUT NOT NECESSARILY CONTRACEPTION”: That’s how Bob Rae characterized the Conservative’s G8 initiative on maternal-health and according to the interweb, that “phrasal template” there — “X if necessary but not necessarily X” — is a “snowclone.” And as far as I know, it could be the only peculiarly Canadian snowclone out there. How neat is that? Oh yeah…. the Liberals are taking the Conservatives to task on the woman-hating aspects of their maternal-health plan, like how it doesn’t provide for contraception. (Globe and Mail)

2. AMERICA IS THE NEW CANADA: John Ibbitson weighs in on what Canada needs to learn from the States about dealing with healthcare reform. (Globe and Mail)

3. THE MOTHER OF ALL FARMING FUCKUPS: Bill Clinton is apologizing for encouraging Haiti to lower trade barriers on American rice in the 90s because the policy decimated Haiti’s agricultural sector and now — right when they need local access to food the most — the country can’t feed itself. But it sure made some Arkansas farmers rich. Nice work, there, unfettered globalization. (the Huff Po)

4. I’M NOT AN INHUMAN, TORTURING MONSTER, BUT I PLAY ONE ON TV: A French TV show recreates the famous Stanley Milgram torture experiment in gameshow format. Contestants believed they were electrocuting someone when incorrect answers were given. The electrocutee was an actor. The electorcutors were not. Only 16 of the 80 contestants stopped before delivering what they believed was a lethal shock. (Boing Boing)

5. THE ONLY GOOD ALTERNATIVE ENERGY IS A DEAD ALTERNATIVE ENERGY: A Danish think tank came out last year with a study claiming to debunk Denmark’s wind energy industry. It was supposed to be one of those nails in the coffin of alternative energy, proof that wind power doesn’t reduce carbon emissions and yet more cause for governments to fatalistically accept fossil fuels as the only reliable and effective energy source. Well, turns out, the group that was actually behind the anti-wind study was the Institute for Energy Research, an Exxon-backed, pro-coal, pro-oil, climate-change-denying lobby group. Turns out, wind works, wind’s cheaper than fossil fuels, wind reduces your carbon footprint. Go figure. (DeSmog Blog)

6. DON’T HATE ME BECAUSE I’M A RIGHT-WING LUNATIC: Ann Coulter is in Canada spreading around her whacko ideas on politics with a speaking tour that winds up in… you guessed it… Calgary. And at her first stop, she is claiming that she — Ann Coulter — is the victim of a hate crime because the president of the University of Ottawa sent her a letter in advance of her visit warning her, obliquely, in code, that she might want to reign in her anti-Muslim ravings because they could get her arrested up here because of our hate-speech legislation. Oh Ann. You gotta quit eating all that Texas beef. The prions are getting to you. (National Post)

Author: Paul Dechene

Paul Dechene is 5'10'' tall and he was born in a place. He's not there now. He's sitting in front of his computer writing his bio for this blog. He has a song stuck in his head. It's "Girl From Ipanema", thanks for asking. You can follow Paul on Twitter at @pauldechene and get live updates during city council meetings and other city events at @PDcityhall.

2 thoughts on “Six in the Morning: The Snowclone Edition”

  1. Very good uses of snowclones (and thanks for introducing the name of them!). Very clever and well done, pat pat.

  2. Hopefully those TV stars get counseling if they need it now. I’m not surprised the French have a high proportion of sheep. I wonder if we’re worse or better off.

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