1 YOU KNOW, HE DIDN’T HAVE TO DO THAT, SO NEITHER SHOULD SHE Prairie dog types always talk about the necessity of tipping and paying people working in the service industry an adequate wage. So we have to comment on this: on the day he lost his $28 million payday, Peyton Manning tipped a waitress big bucks, then posted the tip over the internet. She’s now an ex-waitress.

2 ROSIE’S SOCCER ROUNDUP Clint Dempsy, a member of the U.S. men’s national team, is officially too good for Fulham. Lionel Messi may be too good for the planet. And Toronto FC, kind of like the team their owners are named after, blew a two-goal lead. But Toronto FC is at least entertaining. Almost as entertaining as Irish soccer fans and Rangers FC’s tax case.

3 THE MOST IGNORANT THINGS RUSH LIMBAUGH HAS SAID Bet you can’t stop at just one.

4 THIS POST BROUGHT TO YOU BY RED BULL Rob Anders, another one of those Cons’ yahoo MPs that people send to Ottawa with depressing regularity, falls asleep during a Veterans Affairs parliamentary hearing. It’s not the first time he’s fallen asleep during parliamentary duties. First, he denies it. Then he blames the NDP and the veterans who were giving testimony. Then he issues a four-paragraph apology. Yeah. Conservatives REALLY support the troops.

5 THIS MAY PUT EVERYONE OFF SEX. FOREVER Hulk Hogan has a sex tape … HULK HOGAN HAS A SEX TAPE? Careful, what is seen cannot be unseen.

6 AND THEY CALL IT DEMOCRACY He was banned from City Hall in a New Mexico city because he’s facing extortion charges. He just got elected mayor. Of that city.

YOUR MUSICAL MOMENT OF ZEN In honor of Rob Anders, here’s Concrete Blonde, singing Lullaby.