REVIEW: ‘The Last Jedi’ is Star Wars’ Best Film Since ‘Empire’

Rey (Daisy Ridley) looks into the horizon, as all you do in Star Wars.

As satisfying as The Force Awakens was, as the dust settled, it became clear than J.J. Abrams had basically remixed A New Hope for a new generation without bringing new ideas to the fore (heck, Abrams went for yet another Death Star, the most cumbersome of weapons). Considering this development, concerns over The Last Jedi being another Empire Strikes Back weren’t unfounded.

Enter Rian Johnson. The writer/director behind the brainy indies Brick, Looper and The Brothers Bloom explores corners of the Star Wars universe never seen before on screen, without breaking the mold. Chief among them, a scenario beyond the battle between good and evil that has characterized the saga. Johnson also takes full advantage of the visual possibilities and deliver the most unique-looking episode of the franchise, without becoming a CGI hodgepodge like the prequels. Continue reading “REVIEW: ‘The Last Jedi’ is Star Wars’ Best Film Since ‘Empire’”

DA: The Force Awakens (After A Copyright Attack)

Daily AggregationHoly Happy Afternoon, Batman! It’s 23°C in Regina! Why am I inside? To over-write a blog post, apparently. Here’s things. Get your reading hat on, some of this stuff is great.

1. MORE JOBS, WAIT. MAYBE NOT Conflicting reports on Saskatchewan’s employment situation.

2. SPITEFUL SASK GOVERNMENT BABIES CAN’T HANDLE CRITICISM, LASH OUT The Opposition NDP 11 MLAs. The governing Sask Party has 51. The Opposition NDP just had its funding cut by $64,00, compared to $130,000 for the government. The Sask Party loses $2,550 for every MLA. The NDP? $5,800. That isn’t just unfair, it’s targeted suppression of a political opponent. Who do these bullies think they are, Putin?

3. MASSIVE SASKATOON POLICE SCANDAL Two cops made fun of crime victim Bronek Hart’s name. Unacceptable! Wait. Bronek? That is kind of a funny-sounding name. Apparently it’s Czech (from “Brotislav”) and means “glorious armor”. Doesn’t sound like Bronek has very thick armor. Well, he was having a bad day. Hopefully the cops will apologize for being idiots and for using an offensive slur, and we can all go back to reading about the end of the world, speaking of…

4. SYRIA: NO MUSHROOM CLOUDS YET SO THAT’S GOOD U.S. President Donald J. Trump gave Russian ally Syria a 59 penis pummeling last night. Here’s the Washington Post’s latest. Not that the regime doesn’t deserve a faceful of missiles, but Assad has been murdering children for a long time and it seems unlikely this will stop that. Besides, it’s not like this will inspire that grandstanding, egomaniacal hypocrite to accept Syrian refugees, which is what he’d do if he actually gave a shit about children.

5. SYRIA: MORE: “World leaders react to strike”, “U.S. Missile Strikes Bring Angry Russian Response”, “Was Trump’s Syria Strike Illegal?”“Trump’s Foreign Policy Is Dangerously Impulsive”,“The Grim Logic Behind Syria’s Chemical Weapons Attack”, “U.S. Tries To Restore Military Back Channel With Russia After Syria Strikes”.

6. SYRIA: TRUDEAU SUPPORTS MISSILES AND REFUGEES Yuuuuuugh. Well he’s in a tough spot. The country he leads is next door to a deranged and heavily armed giant. Still grotesque and nauseating.

7. SYRIA: JEET HEER: THE GENERALS HAVE WON THEIR WAR WITH TRUMP One of our favourite mighty intellectuals throws his brain at Trump’s Syrian adventure.

8. SYRIA: BRIAN WILLIAM’S BEAUTIFUL MISSILES I assume the news anchor was trying to make a darkly poetic analogy contrasting the lights and colours of rockets with the destruction they cause but it didn’t work and bringing Leonard Cohen into it is just shitty. Also I apologize for writing “59 penis pummeling” at the start of this thing. That was horrible.

9. AN OILERS OWNER SEX SCANDAL? Stepping away from conflicts between nuclear powers: so Daryl Katz is being sued. First: don’t threaten the careers of women you’ve propositioned after they’ve turned you down. Second: fuck, just don’t be an entitled rich creep. Third: there are professional sex workers out there happy to take money for companionship. Even from gross, slimy men.

BAD LIP READING: THE FORCE AWAKENS After a ridiculous, and brief, copyright takedown, the latest Bad Lip Reading video is back online. While not as amazing as “Seagulls (Stop It Now)”, it’s still a lot of fun.

Luke’s Last Stand???

Good day, Regina! it’s -7 right now (5:00) and it’ll get down to -9 tonight. The sun arose, so I am told, at 8:45 and will plop at 5:37. On this day in history the first Frisbees went on sale. I’ve always thought Wham-O toys (best name ever) bought the plans from the U.S. military, which developed the basic concept at its Roswell base and sold it, like other patents based on alien tech, to raise funds for its off-the-books expedition to the hollow earth’s interior. What do you guys think? Let me know in the comments.

1. WOMEN SAVE THE WORLD Hey, how about those protests? Read about them in The Toronto Star, The Washington Post, The New York Times, The Globe And Mail, The Guardian, NowThe Stranger, The Guardian and The Guardian again. Also, check out CBC, SalonNPR and Slate (and cartoons!).

2. TRUMP DID NOT “DELETE” CLIMATE CHANGE AND LGBTQ RIGHTS FROM THE WHITE HOUSE PAGE It’s just a new page. The old page went here. That’s how it works. Come on guys, we’re supposed to be Team Fact. I mean, Trump’s obviously still a homophobic ass hair and climate science nitwit. (See? See how I stuck to facts there?)

Anyways, here’s a good New York Timesstory with a misleading headline.

3. I GUESS THE TRANS-PACIFIC PARTNERSHIP IS DEAD But this might not be a bad thing. Investors’ rights clauses have made many a trade deal sketchy.

4. “ALTERNATIVE FACTS” Trump and his people are either lying or unable to separate reality from fantasy. Take your pick! Got proof their inauguration turnout was lower than either of Obama’s? They just say it’s the bigliest!

5. TRUMP REINSTATES RULE TO HURT WOMEN IN DEVELOPING COUNTRIES Evil. More here. Who said “women’s rights are human rights”, again? That person should’ve run for president. I bet Americans would’ve elected her.

6. TRUMP’S WHITE MALEOCRACY Trump’s cabinet is the least diverse since Reagan’s.

7. BORDER THUGS BLOCK TRUMP PROTESTERS Apparently some U.S. border agents are power-abusing ideologues who hate women. Assholes. Almost as bad: “Jeepers, we’d better not raise a fuss,” says Canada.

8. I HOPE ANNA MINARD IS OKAY She seems depressed for some reason. You should read this issue’s American Underpants.

9. NOW WHAT? Prime Minister Justin Trudeau leads a cabinet retreat to figure out how to handle President Fucko.

10. ALBERTA FARMERS DON’T LIKE CARBON TAXES File this one under “boo hoo”. Hearing farmers parrot oil industry propaganda (“wealth redistribution”, “tax grab”, “won’t help anything anyway”) while ignorantly dismissing the reality of climate change would test any reasonable person’s patience. I would think farmers would prefer a carbon tax to a hard cap on emissions, which could have them scrambling and spending a fortune to get into compliance. Carbon taxes are a market-based response to climate change, not a wealth redistribution scheme. If people want to whine, they should complain we didn’t start to address this 30 years ago. Jerks.

11. DON’T PUT JADE EGGS IN YOUR VAGINA Bad Gwyneth!

12. BEST OF FOOD AND DRINK VS. 2017 We’re working on our draft category list for this year’s pool which goes live in a week! Got a suggestion? Put it in the comments! Here’s last year’s Best Of Food for reference.

13. THE LAST JEDI That’s the just-released name of the next Star Wars movie. Why is the title in Sith red? If they off Luke, it’ll be my LAST Star Wars movie.

REVIEW: Rogue One Is A Special Life Event

Jyn Erso, the hero we deserve.

While the return of the Star Wars franchise in the form of The Force Awakens was wholeheartedly welcomed, Chapter VII raised a few red flags. The similarities to the original Star Wars were numerous and conspicuous, which got people wondering if the new trilogy would end up being a remix of the original.

Rogue One: A Star Wars Story avoids this brewing problem by delivering the most original tale of the Rebellion since Jedi. Sure, the structure is videogame-like and the plot contrivances can be more exasperating than exciting, but the characters are edgier and their interactions are a lot spikier than what we’ve become used to. Continue reading “REVIEW: Rogue One Is A Special Life Event”

The Force Awakens And Hopes It Doesn’t Suck

The Star Wars: The Force Awakens official trailer is finally in theatres and online. I’ve only watched it three times looking for hints on degrees of suckiness.

Hints that it might suck: 1) The Title. The Force Awakens? I didn’t know it went to sleep. I thought Luke, Leia and Hans saved the galaxy at the end of episode VI? Maybe the force needed some R and R and this movie is a Beach Blanket Bingo romp fest with Disney castaways. 2) Comic Relief. Jar Jar Binks completely ruined the first episode. Now they have a little Weebles Wobbles rolling robot. That’s not the droid we’re looking for. 3) JJ Abrams did Star Trek. What happened to the great nerd divide? Worlds are colliding. 4) Disney. ‘Nuff said but then again a Star Wars theme park might not be a bad thing. Hoth, Tatooine, okay maybe not. 5) Black Friday. Dark Side. Get it?

Stay tuned for the other trailers in The Star Wars Franchise.

Episode VIII: The Force Orders A Double Double

Episode IX: The Force Tries Parsec Speed Dating For The First Time